hidden. . .

The Indissoulubility

Looking for his being lout,

All twidling in oblivion

Both vine and tree vive

Emblemishing the emblematic pen of escutcheon

Quotidian chevalier concealed cicatrix

His cordiality outburst aye

Never clog nor rustle

Ludicrous masquerader truly leal

Ingenuity

As of my introduction, hehe,. lets post my horoscope for this day! uhuh'

Virgo (Aug 23 - Sep 22)[?]
The Bottom Line
Today, toss yourself a mystery to solve -- surprise yourself with your
ingenuity.

In Detail
You know exactly what you are doing right now, but that could become a problem soon. When you're never confused or uncertain, you are comfortable -- but are you growing? Today, toss yourself a mystery or two to solve. Find a problem that you can't figure out how to approach, and try to use your brain in a whole new way. You'll surprise yourself with an unexpected level of ingenuity and creativity. You have more skills like this that need to be developed.


My day was a total messed! yuckeee..bADTRIP! ( April 29,2009)

Actually I was really inspired yesterday not until ate J told me something about him..It was really disgusting! She told me that they had some conversation yesterday and it was something eew.. When I knew about it, I was so much affected because I did not even say it to her then she was the one making her own story. Well if she meant it as a joke i don't even care at all..basta kalain gid tana ang feeling. . She hurt me that waay..%sk!
Yah! I supposed not to be guilty for I dont even know ABOUT it however i DWELL MORE ON the way he interpreted the joke! I guess he took it seriously.. What else could he think about my kind? Hai. waay gid ate j ah! she always make my day unforgettable in her negative means.. Hehe.. Well, I should not be affected of it for I was in clear conscience that I did'nt make it.. I knoe I'm right .
upsetting, isn't it!?

Pero kalain gid abi. Just imagine!

Everything went wrong. I could'nt even greet him in the hall way though I'm not guilty of it but I was trulyl ashamed for what she did,. Hai. She has to speak in "appropriate " time and an appropriate "thing". The painful of all is that she had made her own story to tell. Here I am making my own reality and working out everything.hai,.
Well, what else I could do if everything was done. ,

just to accept it and face it on!

This time I'm the VICTIM,..

JUST AT THIS MOMENT,.



Now, do I need to experience it just to test my skill in this means of solving problem?
well.. can't figure it out!

"bitterness of life in a tasteless world"

Life is a never-ending journey and all I have to make is a trail to be followed..
This semester taught me a lesson that temporary negligence will seize what are to be taken in you.

Before, my mind always taught me how to be look smart and how to speak with posture. I am always eager to learn and to meet my new set of classmates. By this , I learned to aim higher rather to be passive and dependent on the opinion of others. It was then when I feel to deviate from something new because it seems that everything is merely a repetition of the other day and became a habitual for me, it is something tasteless because I learned nothing at all..

Way back then, college life is a matter of survival, that's my impression when i enter to college and it was proven true back then in first year. I took everything seriously.
Days, months and years go by I encountered new faces , met new set of friends with different personalities, handled organizations and participated in different activities that shaped me until I welcomed junior year with nothing - I mean no effort at all. This semester was the most unforgettable sem. I had in my college for it was terribly a disaster not just to me but to all of us ' Of course it was indeed relative depending on the way it affects us. I guess there is nothing to worry! I persist I'm okay but i know myself couldn't escape to the aching wounds that beat every time I presume it is healed, yet the pain still goes on my veins. .

why now? is this really meant to happen? well I can't go along with what I wanted before because in the first place it is me who let go of everything in exchanged of something new other than a tasteless world.. Now , is tasteless better than bitter? - regrets.. but why couldn't be someone permitted to look for something new without forgetting or valuing the other thing? ? hai. ... but why is there a need to lose something to gain something..?hai..

See! no matter how confident or stable you are but still life has its own patterns to take. It is your decision whether you lead or deviate from it.


Now, if something is for you then reach it, seize every opportunity that blocks the way. Yet, we only cross this life for once- in every phase of it there is always something to be enjoyed! Never neglect that something just because you are tamed of doing it for even temporary negligence leads to forgetting and washing everything away from you.. believe it!


However, life must go on! we still have many roads to take we may not know how many bridges we are to cross, lets us be POSITIVE in all our ways. . Life is just temporal and we have to enjoy every last minute that passed by; give our best and leave a trail in every opportunity we take in..

Lets moved on!

tamed,...

The feeling seems to be fading when the month of hearts come.. I felt so restless and exhausted. All the heavy loads, battalion of requirements plus my hectic schedule. I don't even know where could I place him..It seems that I am imprisoned in the loop surrounded by the attraction of positive and negative poles on its magnetic field. Hoo, if breathing is not voluntary then for sure I could not breath at all..[Yes its true.] Everything is getting to be unfair for the both of us. If I would compare it to any law in Science, it would be the law of INERTIA..for no one will take the first step and remain atrest unless it has exerted effort or force.. haha..

Okay, how did I feel after hearing those sentiments and shortcomings? am I affected? OUCH ,it hurts! but I guess its for the better. I really need some space - I mean the both of us. . . I don't know what follows after this..Lets see if there's progress after a week. Then if there's such the better, if theres none I guess it is just right to stop it for its better to put period on a sentece rather putting a comma without making sense.The truth is Februaru 14,2009 is the worst of all the valentine's day I had.

best choice I have ever made!

here i am again facing the dilemma as to which I shall prefer..

24th day of June , I and my dear friend woke up at early as 3:45 am. .. We prepared for our breakfast, took our daily bath and wore our comfortable yet elegant outfits..hehe

We arrived at school at 5:25 am since our departure was at 6:00..I waited for my classmates until 6 am as to which I gathered their permits..indeed my dear friend(2) finally arrived. hehe..Well, I rode in the mini bus; we started our journey with a prayer...Whoooooo, ready to GENSAN na..First area was in the fishport.. Oh, its raining then. We interviewed the people working in there. Next venue was "HOME FOR THE AGED" , we were welcomed by a woman named lola Maria-apa. I can see in her smile the feeling of joy in seeing us. We danced and gave our best moves for the aged people. Yet, they were so joyful and its refreshing that I have made them happy even just for that day.. hehe, after showing our indifferent moves we interviewed them and as I can see it, they were acting more than such a 5 -year old child in demanding candies from us. They have different stories to tell. I comforted them in a while so was my classmates were busy listening to our lolos and lolas. Suddenly there was a man who went back into his room. I came to know that no one dared to interview him so I with my colleagues went after him. We interviewed him in a usual manner as we could. We go on depth on his life and its unusual that a handsome man like him was not able to look for a wife. He experienced stroke ; he had his adopted but he got married already and the wife of his adopted was against him. We soon realized that he was a man with a fragile heart.. yes! lolo is a gay. If you have just seen his picture you would not really believe that he is a gay. We have fun telling in the bus about Lolo Roming. Hence, be careful to my friends for you will live by yourself as soon as you get old. Haha! Anyway, after that we proceed to KAWAS. My experience there are worth to be remembered. We fetch water nearby the seashore, we have cooked them for lunch and we really experience how was life in there. Next. We went to Urban poor. There, I have experienced to pity them. They have nothing to eat the moment we visited them, only sweet potatoes all day long. And then, there was the daugther of the woman we have interviewed, crying for she had nothing to eat and so her baby was still crying. My heart was deeply eaten by those experiences, so I insisted to buy some foods for them, I even if sacrificed my money for my project just to put off their hunger. We went back to the bus for the last sector, the women's prisoners. There was a strict implementation of order in entering the place. No cellephones are allowed! The students queued up and the boarders welcomt them in the small field. It was fun and memorable! I myself had interviewed a mother. She has a daugther studying at NDDU. Actually, her case is staffa. She was almost 5 years in the prison. Actually, she was the head of KIMBAll before..Hehe, im not just sure about the spelling. Yet, when the mall was totally eaten by the fire, totally burned, all the stocks and goods turned into ashes then she had nothing to blame! all of her stockholders are running after their profits. She had experience of fire in the hell for she has nothing to give more than paying worth 1.5 million pesos. She said that we can really never tell our fate. Anyway two years from now , she will be out from the prison. However, she added her grief in the delay of her case.."but why wait for 2 years"? Now is the moment that my daughter needs me, I must take charged her growth; witness the special moments in her life!.When I heard this it seems that my tears seems to fall from my eyelids.. I agree, ate Malou is supposed to be out from the imprisonment but because of the government hired lawyer, the case is delayed. There are wasted times that they have to enjoy together but was taken and grab by the people who tend to be submersive. I ended my conversation with her with a big hug and piece of words that somehow could help her lift up herself from the parameters of thse colours. I have realized how fortunate I am for having a mother who is always there to support me, witness my achievements and sorrows, whom I can share my lovelife and cheer me up in times of darkness.

We went back almost at 6. I can see the sunset with the horizon, telling that my day was totally complete. Though I was not able to join the marist meet, but this choice is a perfect choice I have ever made.

No to cheating!

What is cheating? Indeed it is tantamount to the word dishonesty!

Midterm exam again,. Two-weeks before the exam , I decided to familiarize my lessons. Acting without effort on it for I believe the longer the time you spend the longer the memory retains. .haha .. First week was spent on the familiarization of words and updates of notes while the following week was intended for the serious study. Sleepless nights, packs of kopikos, venues for group studies and bundles of handouts were at hand. The following morning addressed the warm greetings. . They faced me with black-rounding eye-bags and exhausted faces. Nobody was exempted on it! hehe, .Our first exam was Afro-asian Literature. Everybody felt a compounding emotion of trouble, worries and excitement. Everything that was trembling within was out minded..Well, the moment the test booklets were being disposed and dropped in the desks, everybody was able to manage themselves at ease . As I read the questionnaire, I was astonished with the questions being stipulated in there. .Actually , it was in the identification type that I'd answer only 9 numbers out of 20 questions ..its a total messed! haha, how about you guys? & how about the enumeration type, one that I hated much! well, better,. I'd answered 5 out of 15 items..huhuhu, I want to blurt out, as if its the end of my worth.. . paano nalang ni ang kinabukasan ko? hai Its the poorest of all. I studied much its just that different from what I was expecting came out. . who is to blame? Neither I nor my teacher. .I gave my best and so was my teacher i guess for giving such quality exams. . The bottom line there is that not all our expectations will be achieved. Life is always coupled with sorrows and pains..hehehehe. .its part of it! I have to share this embarrassing experience of mine..wheeeew! It was 6;30 0f January 2009, when i was taking an examination under our favorite professor. . I rushed up in answering the test for I have studied it already for two nights thinking that I was prepared till I reached up the last part which was the application. I did it well! when I reviewed my answers I tempted to ask my dearest friend of letter 'S' in the chunking that I missed to reassure if what's in my mind was correct. . HE/she attended me and told me that it was in the instruction asking for five answers(5) only but I'd answer all 7 for it was a guideline and everything must be placed in there,hence ; I missed the letter ' S". So somehow our eyes and gestures argued till it was coupled with our mouths. . Lately we realized and noticed that our professor was actually looking and smiling on us the moment we argued.......Whaaaaaaaaaaa! I can't imagine. Just for a point I had afford to exchanged my credibility..I won't and I will never do it anymore. .Why shouldn't I rely just on my own answers since I knew that I have studied too, so was with them. . I don't know what the psychological reason behind it, hehe. .(shame on me!) Anyway, that's the consequence of being a novice. . haha, joke! Anyway, I learned from my mistakes and to be able to cope with it. I must get the chain that enclosed me in believing and trusting my own intuitions . Its better to get zero(0) than getting a perfect score through cheating ( just in RE).. HEhe. .
The following day, I never talked to anyone else the moment our examination started. .Even just responding to the date and subject they asked to me..Haha, . Finally, I enjoyed my midterm exam. .I realized that I really have to commit mistakes in order to weigh up things; to differentiate what is bad from moral.. By struggling towards our conscience... This when we can say, NO TO CHEATING!

unusual...

is it wrong to fall in love?
Its good to fall in love. .Yah its a painful thing I know but all I have to do is to enjoy it now that its strucked me. .
How's the feeling? well, its like a blossoming flower , that tries to hold my pistil and closely cover my faces everytime I see him.
his eyes were conveying, it impinged directly to the beat of my heart. We happened to close hands together and it was electrifying that you better take away your hand out from him or else you will be totally burned or if not be totally molten..Haha, .I can't really describe how it feels. . I'm a kind of person who who have been living in the world of thinking and reasoning for i have 3 siblings , all boys . So, I used not to be expressive unlike the other girls , not showy of my emotions (sorrows and dilemmas. ) There are times that you are out of your mind if you're inlove. Often, you are searching for his shadow but if he's already beside you as if you don't even care or knew him.
That's love, undefinable..You act so weird, sometimes. . .